The link between material possessions and our state of mind is controversial. Whilst I will agree that things don’t equal happiness, I will also admit that a gorgeous new dress can liven up a dreary day in a manner that no amount of navel gazing self-help can never achieve. I have no desire for doctors to begin prescribing Prada instead of Prozac. I can just see the shades of grey here. What I can’t see is how BMW can claim to not only manufacture over-priced middlemanagementmobiles but also a powerful, positive human emotion. Oh yes, they also make JOY! Not mere happiness, no that is too fluffy and cute. We are talking full blown, celestial trumpet blasting, bathing in a stream of chocolate whilst eating a marshmallow loofah, champagne cork popping JOY!!!! In their car factories there must be a pixie dust conveyor belt where highly efficient and reliable pixies scatter each car with their magic joy dust. My personal highlight of the ad is the bold declaration that ‘joy is efficient’. How the hell can that be correct? How about ‘joy is punctual’ or ‘joy is reliable’ or ‘joy is capable of working to tight deadlines and as part of a team’? Is Joy applying for a job in an office somewhere, where it will spend its days getting to know other powerful emotions such as ‘Disappointment’ and ‘Resentment’ as they huddle around the photocopier? Sure, the advert has the ‘wise older man’ voiceover and lots of glossy folks all frolicking in a manner suggesting some form of joyfulness, but come on! The joyous frolickers were told to act in such a manner and Mr Wise Sounding Older Guy probably doesn’t believe a word of the trite nonsense he’s being paid shed loads to spout. BMW are not responsible[.....]

If you sit next to someone smelly on the bus, What is the correct thing to do? Do you stand and, politely, ask to move? Or make a show of holding your nose? Maybe mourn the indignity of a stench so foul: “In this day and age how can it come to be, “That this someone is so smelly?” Drown your senses in a shower of perfume, Create a floral fog as miasmas loom. Look ahead and secretly enjoy wallowing in the stench. Like petrol on a summer’s day, Mixed with fresh cut grass and wet creosote. The only correct response would be: “I hope the smelly someone isn’t ever me.”

‘Jeggings’ – try saying the word out loud and not smiling. In a case of life imitating language, or ‘visual onomatopoeia’  if you will, it can be confirmed that jeggings not only sound silly, but they also look incredibly silly. At this point you may well be wondering what on earth jeggings may be. Well, let me enlighten you… They are a prime example of the fashion world’s habit of making up words and fashions by simply taking two existing items and mashing them together. The result is an array of weird Frankenstein style, clothing hybrids. In the case of jeggings, we take the denim of jeans (‘je-’) and combine with the stretchy, skin tight fabric and elasticated waistband of leggings (‘-ggings’) et voila! Jeggings are born. The resulting garment of this unholy marriage has turned out to be the surprise fashion hit of spring/summer 2009. They have become the garment of choice for a certain type of hipster, who digs the style of  bag of rags fashion icon Agyness Dean and pop princess Lady Gaga. They are for the girls who have started to find that their skinny jeans are just not skinny enough. For the uninitiated, it can prove tricky to distinguish jeggings from, say, really tight jeans or blue leggings. In these cases the fully elasticated waistband, faux over-stitching and jazzy haircut of the wearer will provide valuable clues. The trend for hybrid fashions can be traced back to the mid-eighties, when our dear Dame Vivienne Westwood created the ‘mini-crini’. It was a short and flouncy skirt that drew on period influences – the ornate bouffiness of the Victorian crinoline skirt fused with the groundbreaking, leg baring of the  mini-skirt. The fashion world swooned and a precedent was set. Fast forward to the 21stcentury and we are[.....]

There is much about Gok Wan that I find highly likeable. I like the way he seems to genuinely give a toss about the people he styles (he doesn’t destroy their self-esteem whilst groping their cellulite and acting all superior c.f Trinny and Susannah). I like the way he sings the praises of the ‘Great British High Street’, like, all the time. I like the way he promotes capsule wardrobes instead of buying loads of rubbish you’d never wear. Here comes the but… There is something that just doesn’t work for me. Be it bangles, brooches or belts, the boy just doesn’t know where to stop. He can’t help but over-accessorize every outfit, and for me somethings are unforgivable. One of my favourite ever quotes goes thus: “When accessorizing, always take off the last thing you put on” It came from the doyenne of fashion design that was Coco Chanel. Now, I don’t know about  you, but I would always prefer to play by her rules than those of a man whose bon mots include referring to breasts as ‘bangers’ and calling a woman ‘girlfriend’. Showing that you can recreate designer looks on the high street is honourable. Adding a headscarf, shades, a belt, 5 corsages, 24 necklaces, 36 bracelets and a handbag, with another necklace glue-gunned on to make a ‘statement’, is madness. It is as if he has so little faith in clothing produced by the Great British High Street that he feels an uncontrollable urge to mask the clothing with as many bells, whistles and baubles he can lay his hands on. Please Gok, stop this madness. Style something simple and chic. Remember: Less is more, be it high street or haute couture.

Things look rubbish for newspaper journalism right now. Local newspapers are disappearing and the nationals are getting increasingly worried about their future. With this is mind I’ve gathered some links to various insights on the state of print media: There was a feature in the G2 by Stephen Moss earlier this month that raised some interesting issues about the future of the local press. He talked a great deal about the link between local newspapers and local democracy. Personally, I’m not sure if the local press is that integral to the delivery of democracy. What use is a voice when no one is listening any more? Was that voice clear and loud enough in the first place? Thoughts please! Editor of Vogue, Alexandra Shulman expressed her views on the future of print media whilst speaking at the Fashion Business Club.Click here to watch the video. A few questions popped into my head after watching this clip: Have newspapers killed themselves? Has the transfer from print to on-line been mismanaged? People are still buying Vogue inspite of comprehensive (and free) online content. Why? Is it a prestige issue (i.e. you want to ‘own’ Vogue as it says something about you as a person)? If so, how can newspapers tap into this and become desirable as objects? An article was published on the BBC news website last week in which newspaper chiefs warned against the  ”death of journalism as we know it”. Newspaper bosses are calling for media merger laws to be updated to allow an ‘even playing field’ for newspapers when faced with competition for advertising revenue from on-line heavy weights such as Google and Yahoo.

English tourist attractions are, in the main, naff. Any destination that feels the need to mention toilets and free parking in their promotional materials is clearly scraping the barrel of fun. The thing is, I wouldn’t want it any other way. Our attractions are naff, but it is all part of their charm. I love an on-site tearoom and gift shop (normally flogging over priced shortbread, lavender sachets and rubber tipped pencils). I love the way all the leaflets claim to be ‘fun for all the family, come rain or shine!’. Give me a donkey sanctuary,  model village or cider farm over Disneyland any day. Here is the Bookish Brunette guide to some of the finest examples of English (and a bit rubbish/weird) tourist attractions Bakelite museum and tea room – Williton, Somerset Did you know they have a museum dedicated to ‘Bakelite and vintage plastics’? Here’s proof. The promotional leaflet contains one of my favourite ever visitor testimonials: “I felt I had lost my memory until today” M & G Cooke, Swindon Cool. A museum that cures memory loss. Forget about Lourdes, Williton in Somerset is the new miracle must-go destination. Also scores extra points for including the tearoom in the attraction name, no mucking about here. Bunnyland and guinea pig paradise – Yorkshire Take me there. Now. Cumberland Pencil Museum – Keswick, Lake District You get to see the world’s first ever pencil. Cool, huh? I’ve been twice. It is that good. The first time I went, they claimed to have the world’s longest pencil but they now claim to have the world’s longest ever coloured pencil (7.91m long). Hmm…a subtle yet telling change me thinks.  Another “perfect all-weather attraction”. And yes, it does have a coffee shop. Dudley Zoo and Castle Included out of fierce local loyalty. Some decent art deco animal enclosures[.....]

Adventures on the High Teas by Stuart Maconie Did you know that you recreate the gastronomic experience of a Twiglet by simply dipping a stick of dry spaghetti into a jar of Marmite? No? Well now you do. You’ll thank me if you’re ever hosting a cocktail party and you suddenly realise that (gasp) your supply of yeast extract flavoured wheat based snacks has become perilously low. Stuart Maconie has a knack for wondering hopelessly off course yet still, somehow, keeping you hanging on his every word. The Twiglet tiplet (doesn’t adding ‘let’ to the end of words make them sound cute?) is a prime example of this. Middle England and Maconie work together like, well, dry spaghetti and Marmite, or perhaps, more fittingly, clotted cream and strawberry jam. He explores the towns and cities that have come to epitomise a very certain sort of Englishness – the spa towns, rural communities and the suburban sprawls. His highly informal investigations reveal much more than disgruntled Daily Mail readers. Middle England has given the world some of the finest music, literature and comedy of recent times. Proof that middle needn’t always equal mediocre. The brief wondrous life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz A kind of American ‘White Teeth’. I’m only half way through, so the book may turn out to be absolutely nothing like White Teeth, but I’ll stick to my initial impression for now. I don’t think I’ve ever read anything that has won the Pullitzer Prize for fiction before, I tend to be more drawn to the Richard and Judy Book Club recommended reads. I feel all high brow and sophisticated each time I pick this book up. Told in a distinctive patois that can, at times, prove tricky to fully comprehend, the story begins with Oscar, a[.....]